I am 27. In January, I’ll be 28. Then 29. Then…30.
I have always had a touch of Peter Pan Syndrome, but recently life has sent me some sad reminders that I am getting old.
The following has happened all within the last month:
First, I got a root canal to fix a tooth that has been bothering me for years. While getting dental work done doesn’t necessarily equate to being old in my mind; I have always thought a root canal was something that old people get thanks to the “Bart Gets an F” episode of The Simpsons where Bart has a flash forward to when he’s old and still in school. In the scene, a shriveled old Ms. Krabappel asks Bart, who’s in his mid-forties, the name of the pirate inΒ Treasure Island. Old Bart responses with “Look, Lady. I have a peptic ulcer, my wife’s hounding me for a new car,Β and I need a root canal…” It’s just one of those weird things that always sticks with you.
Then, I found out that I need reading glasses. Not just glasses, reading glasses. At that point, I felt like I was a cardigan away from an AARP card. I mean, don’t get me wrong, these glasses make reading and using the computer actually bearable, but every beyond what I’m looking at is blurry. So trying to look at my computer and then the TV is a little complicated. I think I might need bifocals. You know…those things my Dad (and Benjamin Franklin, the dude who invented them) wears. I’m currently wearing them on the tip of my nose like a Foster Grant model.
Finally, and this one is the kicker, my family dog Molly died after fighting off a rattlesnake at my parents’ house. We’ve had Molly since I was a freshman in high school. She was an amazingly sweet dog who was a friend to everyone…except for other dogs.
After Molly died a few weeks ago, it felt like the universe was telling me “homeboy…you’re old. This is a thing that you are going to have to accept.” I know it might sound weird, but it has kind of put me in this third-life crisis. (I was calling it a quarter-life crisis, you know, to sound cool like John Mayer in Why Georgia, but then Megan corrected me. Little does she know that I’m going to live to 108). It’s been a pretty bizarre year to say the least.
So after all of this, it has become clear that I need to lose this weight. Before I know it, I’m going to be 35 with kids or something like that and then I’ll blink and I’ll be talking about the 1990’s and the good ol’ days of the Nintendo 64. It made me realize that I need to reach my goal weight before another four years of the FFK pass me by.
Which I guess leads me into this week’s weigh in. I didn’t post last week’s weigh in because it wasn’t great and I was frankly a little ashamed. I had gained 3.2 pounds after a rough weekend of eating horribly. Then, we went to Disney this past weekend and I still ate a lot at Food & Wine Festival at Epcot. When we got back, however, I was on point with tracking and I had some serious quality time with Henrietta the Kettlebell. This week, I lost 1.8 pounds and weighed in at 258 pounds. It’s not great, but I’m headed in the right direction…again. Now, I’m more focused because I am doing it for my future self. I want to look back at this time 4 years from now the way I thank the 2010 Nathan for making a change after weighing in at 357 pounds.
First of all, you are NOT old. I’m nearly twice your age, so I can say that with some authority. π Secondly though, kudos for recognizing that now is the time to reach your goal. I’ll be 51 in February and I look back with much regret at all the years I let pass by without doing something about my weight. So, while I won’t reach my goal weight in my youth, I WILL get there. Let’s do this thing!!
I wish I could pinpoint the moment I realized I was getting old… lol… everyone is btw. However, I’d say you’re getting interesting. We are so much an amalgamation of everyone and everything around us when we are young but then we start to be us… and some of us braver than others are genuine in who they are… strive for that. mmmm… and sorry about your dog – loss is hard, harder when you’re older. Congrats on the 1.8 loss.
Oh gosh, I loved this post. Mostly because I feel a lot of the same things (just a few years in front of you. Turned 30 in April). Sometimes it’s hard not to look back and think “Man, 25yo Emily would be so dissapointed in 30 yo Emily. I still haven’t gotten my shit together!” All the signs start pointing to “grown-up time,” and this magical land of being a grown-up was when everything was supposed to be fixed. π
GREAT loss this week! Let’s not let another year go by without having made some serious changes, eh? We’ve got nothing but time. π
My awesome friend, you are not old. Besides, it’s just a number! Right? Right. At least that’s what hubby reminds me when I complain about the fact that in February I will be 43 and my 25th high school reunion is next year. When did I become middle-aged?!?! But really I wanted to tell you to keep your chin up and keep being awesome. I am so sorry about your sweet dog, that is such a hard thing to deal with. Hugs….